Do you realize when you tell funny stories, they are always from a long time ago? I'll bet if we all shared the funniest thing that happened to us today, it would be pretty lame. In that spirit, the funniest thing that happened to me TODAY:
It started yesterday, when I confirmed my hair appointment on the phone at work (something that all serious workers do). Today, my co-worker said, "Didn't you get a haircut last night?" and I said yes. He said, "What did they DO?" And I said that they had taken off four inches. And he said, "Oh, well you still look like white trash".
Probably not funny to the naked eye, but when you work in an office everyday, everything is comparitively funny. We treat each other like crap at work. In fact, we call this particular co-worker "CAIL" which is an acronym for Chubby Alcoholic Idiot Loser. Mine's COBRA, and the other member of this loser-family is UFUS (Useless, Fat, Ugly, and Stupid). Someday, I'll tell you what mine means.
We're a family here. A sort of weird combination of The Office, Malcolm in the Middle, and Yo Mama. We're a family, though. A big, fat, disfunctional family.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
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Sounds like one of my old jobs--we routinely told each other to fuck off. One of the better insults came from one of my bosses:
(boss smells potent fishy odor coming from the cafe)
Hey, (my coworker's name), close your legs!
Tasteful, to say the least. You're right about the long-time-ago funniness. Things get funnier with age, like a fine wine.
I'll take a hostile work environment above a friendly one any day. It suits my sarcasm better.
I used to work in a place where everyone was super nice. I'd be all, "How are you?" and always get "I'M GREAT!" in response. And then I would go, "That's what your mom said when she asked me out last weekend." And they'd be all, "You're gross, how rude".
Let me clarify, her previous work enviroment was not the one where everyone was positive!
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