Self-Induced Vomiting to the Oldies

How happy are we that E! has decided to listen to it's fans and stop reporting on Heidi and Spencer Pratt? That's courteous, that's responsible journalism, that's not me.

The Heidi Workout is coming to video stores soon and exposes the secrets to Heidi's physique. Who knew you could get a killer workout just by riding Lauren Conrad's coat tails? Another great way to burn calories? Trying to get your gay husband's attention in the jungle while he ogles a semi-nude Sanjaya Malakar. Those crazy kids. You won't hear another word about them here. Unless they call the paparazzi on their way to Starbucks.

Take My Breath Away, Ladies

The gay community has a new confirmed resident, Kelly McGillis of Top Gun. Yes, that Top Gun. In an interview, twice-divorced McGillis, 51, said she is "done with the man thing".

As a self-proclaimed spokesperson for same-sex marriages and opposite marriages, I think I speak for all lesbians when I say, "Seriously? You want to give us this Kelly McGillis? Um, no thanks."

A Shot at Love Has a Brand New Disease-Infested Whorestar

Aubrey O'Day is in talks with MTV to star in a new season of A Shot at Love. Given the circumstances, MTV is considering tweaking the title and has narrowed it down to several suitable options:


A Shot at Tetanus

A Shot at D-List Reality Star Fame with a D-List Reality Star

A Shot at Aubrey O'Day: Your Friends Dare You

A Shot of Penicillin: You're Gonna Need It

Dissecting US Weekly's Current Cover

StarDroppings is going to save you $3.95 and just tell you what's in this week's US Magazine:

Lindsay Lohan's Secret Drug to Get Thin: It's cocaine. Mystery solved.

Heidi and Spencer's Wedding Album: It's just like the first two.

Jon and Kate Exclusive Caught With Other Woman: Jon minus Kate plus barskank minus pants plus divorce papers minus any future earnings. Way to go, Jon!

Linda Hogan Asking for More Money in the Hulkavorce

Linda Bollea claims she is in danger and seeks an additional $8k per month in alimony from Hulk Hogan so she can afford a home far away in California. Take a good look at Linda; the only thing chasing her is the Grim Reaper.

I am guessing she has also seen this picture and is really seeking an additional $8k to retain Miley Cyrus' hair stylist. The talented digital artists at StarDroppings.com have rendered the scenario if the cougar-money runs out:

Thankfully she buys her wardrobe at stores that accept food stamps. Does anyone want to tell her Forever 21 doesn't mean 1921?

Swine Flu: A Theory

Heidi and Spencer got married last weekend.

Heidi and Spencer are honeymooning in Mexico.

Swine Flu: an elaborate international plan to eliminate the Pratts.

If so (does Mexican hat dance): da da DA da da DA da da DA daaaaaaaa OLE!

If a Transsexual Can Hide an Entire Penis, Surely Britney Can Conceal a Tampon String

The last couple of weeks have not been post-worthy, besides the passing of our favorite Golden Girl, Dorothy Zbornak. Thankfully, someone caught on video a clip that will surely dazzle at the Sundance Film Festival:

I Owe You an Explanation

I know, I know... last week was slow. You see, this is Stardropping.com's 250th post and I wanted to put something really speacial and newsworthy in this place because darn it, you deserve it.

So (drum roll), here it is: a picture of Rosie O'Donnell's cameltoe on it's way to the beach over the weekend. Nothing says 250th post like two hundred and fifty pounds wedged into bike shorts. Now excuse me while I go grab something to eat. Nothing works up my appetite like Rosie O'Donnell dressed like a moving man. Now with 50% more macho!

Eminem is Broke

Eminem - New Music - More Music Videos

So, Eminem released "We Made You" from his fourth album, Relapse, yesterday. Spoofing everything from Rainman to current celebrity couples, Jessica Simpson has vowed not to watch it and Kim Kardashian said she's flattered.

If you're looking for some late 90's Eminem nostalgia, it's a good way to spend four minutes. Unfortunately, it's not a rousing social commentary, even with the addition of Alaska Goverer Sarah Palin. Sadder still, it's a desperate plea to his fans to buy some records pity-style. There's even a subtle plug in the middle of the song, "Think I've got a dirty moth? You should hear the rest of my album!". If only something rhymed with, "Now available on iTunes".

Levi Johnston Breaks His Silence

Mark your calendar for Monday, April 6, when Levi Johnston (the guy who Juno'd Governer Palin's teenage daughter Bristol) will be appearing on The Tyra Banks Show. You can always count on Tyra to get the tough questions answered:

- What does Levi think of Tyra Banks?
- Has Levi ever seen America's Next Top Model, starring Tyra Banks?
- Does Levi think these pants make Tyra Banks' butt look big?
- Does Levi like Tyra Banks' hair?
- Was Levi nervous when he found out he was going to meet Tyra Banks on The Tyra Banks Show?
- What's Levi's most favorite thing about Tyra Banks?

You know where this is going. All the hard-hitting news, Monday on Tyra!